What is a Monster?
A Monster can be a myriad of things according to the dictionary, here is the list:
- terrifying and dangerous, wild or fictional creature.
- A bizarre or whimsical creature.
- An extremely cruel or antisocial person, especially a criminal.
- A horribly deformed person.
- (figuratively) A badly behaved child, a brat.
- (informal) Something unusually large.
- (informal) A prodigy; someone very talented in a specific domain.
© Your Dictionary, LoveToKnow, Corp, 1996-2018 retrieved 29/3/18 from http://www.yourdictionary.com/monster
Just by definition Monsters do exist, in all kinds of forms, so why do we tell our children they don’t exist?
We watch them on TV & in Movies, we read about them in books & Monsters are usually used as a tool to frighten people into NOT doing something, especially when we are children.
I remember my parents using Monsters, as a fear tool “don’t go down there, there’s a monster down there”, do you remember your parents using this phrase or something similar? Just because that old chestnut worked on us, doesn’t mean it works for this generation & who’s to say it was the right thing to do anyway? Doing things our parents did to us is not always in our children’s best interest, as we all know.
Since prehistoric times monsters have been IN people’s minds. Yes I do mean IN. These made up fictional creatures are created by our mind, as a reaction to some stress, fear or unexplained feeling that we experience. It usually comes out in a nightmare & once we’ve seen or felt it’s presence, we keep intensifying its power until the Monster is stronger than our mind. We can then use that Monster to limit ourselves in life.
Anything that is unexplained is a Monster & this is where the Monster gains its power.
If you don’t explain where monsters exist, to your children, they will use their amazingly powerful imaginations to create the most terrifying Monsters that ever existed, that can cause them serious psychological development issues.
When you tell children “Monsters don’t exist” this creates anxiety, stress & fear; especially when in their reality, they have several that they are actually frightened of.
If Mum says “monsters don’t exist”, then who will help me fight/banish/befriend them? No one! Kids feel confused, powerless on their own frightened, hiding in their beds, powerless to move, sleep deprived & mentally torchered, by something that doesn’t exist? I say let monsters exist so we can deal with them. Better to deal with them now than on a psychologists sofa in the future, what do you think?
In the workshops I do with children I have many come to me & explain that “dad doesn’t believe in Monsters, but I know there is one in the shed at our place”. If your child starts talking about monsters, don’t make the situation worse by saying “don’t be silly, monsters don’t exist”, if you do, you have just shutdown the most important conversation you & your child can have & made it impossible for your child to open up to you in the future.
Instead sit down with your child & ask them questions about it like: Where does it live, What does it eat, What does it look like, When does it come out, Do you think it’s friendly? Work with them on a solution. This way you will be able to pinpoint the stress, fear or anxiety that is creating the monster within them. It could be school, a bully, frustration, Anger, a family issue or a combination of all of these that make up the monster. I would personally love if schools introduced a Emotions Coach into schools so that Children could learn the benefits/tools they can use to banish fear & anxiety. It’s a curriculum staple that is currently missing, that I believe is crucial for today & the future of society.
There are too many things in the world that trigger stress & fear in children, all you have to do is watch the 6pm news; which in my opinion, should be rescheduled to a more adult time. The statistics are horrendous these are from Beyond Blue here in Australia
- 112,000 children aged 4 – 17 being treated for depressive disorders (that’s 1 in every 35 kids)
- 560,000 children aged 4 – 17 being treated for mental disorders (that’s 1 in every 7 kids)
- 278,000 children aged 4 – 17 being treated for anxiety (that’s 1 in every 14 kids)
- The number of deaths by suicide in young Australians is the highest it has been in 10 years
I am sure you will agree that this has become a very serious community problem.
Maybe the solution is simple. Talk to your kids about Monsters. Get your kids on your side, help them build some mental resilience/strength & help give them back the power of their mind. Help them create tools to combat their own monster like Tapping, Essential Oils & Monster Spray. These tools are economical & powerful solutions that can happen in the moment that the child can do themselves to prevent them going into meltdown.
It’s the only thing we have not tried as a community so maybe we should all give it a go, for the sake of our kids.
Let’s make sure that we give our kids the tools to give them the power over life’s monsters.